The Marriage Proposal Formula

Francesca Beauman

I was leafing through a book called "The Woman's Book: everything but the kitchen sink" by Francesca Beauman. It's been in my library for ages, and I occasionally flick through it.

It's one of these books that is, essentially, filled with completely random facts.

The random fact I came across was "The Marriage Formula".

Apparently, and I quote; "a simple mathematical formula exists to help one ascertain whether or not to accept a proposal of marriage."

Why is it OK for little girls to love dinosaurs, but not OK for little boys to love Barbie?

Over the weekend I read an interesting article in the Times magazine by Lori Duron, author of Raising My Rainbow: adventures in raising my fabulous, gender creative son.

I'll be honest, I was confused. The article talked about how concerned Lori and her husband were when their son started expressing a love for all toys usually favoured by girls at a young age. From the moment he saw his mom's old barbie doll he was hooked. When he started dressing up in girls clothes they were concerned.

The article, and presumably the book it stems from, talks about how Lori eventually discovered online (where else?) that there was a label she could give her son: gender creative, or gender non-conforming. Somehow having this label made it easier for them. Her worries about whether or not he was homosexual were eased by the discovery of this label.

Her son is 7.

Confused?

Well I am.

You see, regular readers will know that my younger daughter, Little Miss George, loves dinosaurs, plays with cars, is obsessed with Spider-man, Batman, the Teenage Mutant Ninya Turtles, knights and battles and swords. She actively steers away from 'girls' toys, and only occasionally, when she sweetly feels that she'd like to wear an outfit in her wardrobe that she knows we like (she's incredibly thoughtful) she will wear a flowery dress. Otherwise it's leggings or jeans and Marvel comic or dinosaur t-shirts. She even has a shirt for parties.

Her best friends are all boys.

Am I worried that she's a lesbian?

5 tips for de-stressing after a busy Christmas day

I had a lovely Christmas day; good food, excellent gifts (both given and received), great company, and the magic that comes from having two children in the house under the age of 7.

We hosted the meal, as we have done the the last 6 years, and although there were 9 for dinner (it has been 13 before), it went pretty smoothly. Everyone ate their fill; there were 5 different puddings to choose from (if you had the room) and I enjoyed a couple of glasses of the drink that, for me, is a pure Christmas drink, port and lemonade. Yummy.

I am relaxing in front of the TV now and looking forward to Friday. Why? Because I have a pamper day planned. Shellac nails and a back massage in the morning and a cut, colour and blow-dry in the afternoon. Somehow, knowing that the pamper day was booked in, I was far more relaxed on Christmas day than I have been previously. So my first tip for post-Christmas de-stress? Get a treatment booked, be it hair, nails, facial, massage or otherwise. The rest of my list is below. Feel free to add your own tips in the comments or tweet me at @ymummyreally.

1. Get a pampering treatment booked, whether it's nails, hair, massage. Once it's booked you will have it to look forward to.
2. Get out for a walk in the fresh air. It's been a wet, dark winter here in the UK and it's all too easy to stay inside. Wrap up warm and face the weather. A good dose of fresh air will do you the world of good. (I sound like my mother, but of course she's right!)
3. Get some exercise. A good long walk (see tip number 2 above), or even better, a run. An exercise class, or a swim. It doesn't matter what it is and it doesn't matter if it's only 15 minutes. It's better than nothing and you will feel energised and more relaxed as a result.
4. Run yourself a bath, grab a book, play your favourite music. At the same time if possible. Chill out and turn off the phone.
5. Got the family visiting? Need some time to yourself? Then take a break. Even if you simply disappear off to your bedroom for 10 minutes to have a play on Twitter. Taking a small break from the folks will give you chance to take a breath and get ready for the next round of Charades!

I hope you are having a great festive season. Merry Christmas to all my readers. Thank you for visiting this small part of the web. Stick around for 2013! There'll be beauty, travel and parenting tips aplenty!

A service announcement and an invite to write for us

Regular readers will be aware that I started working full time this month, not just in my existing job, but in an entirely new organisation in a promoted post.  It's something of a challenge, and I am currently at the "whose stupid idea was this?" stage.
I have a zillion and one new work things flying around my head, along with a zillion and two different mum-related tasks like "take tombola prize to school for the Christmas fair", "drop off eldest at Christmas disco", "ensure Christmas colouring competition entries are handed into school on time", "write Christmas cards", "arrange trip to Santa's Grotto", "remember which day is mufti day at school", "listen to eldest read her reading books twice a week", "remember to do maths homework with eldest", "pay for gymnastics lessons", "take back library books"........I could go on and on and on, but you get the idea.

All that is on top of the daily food shopping, meal prepping, pot washing jobs. I've already opted to buy in 2 hours of cleaning and 2 hours of ironing each week: and still I don't stop until 10pm, at which point I try and find half an hour of TV, but inevitably fall asleep within 5 minutes.

Life throws these challenges at us. Life has decided to throw a surprise work challenge at my husband this month too, meaning he is working 12 hour days at the moment. Something we couldn't have planned for and which hopefully won't continue for too long.

The result of all this is that my blog is not getting the attention it deserves as I am obviously prioritising family time.   I will continue to post when I can, and want to say a huge thank you to all readers. Please please bear with me.

I will also consider guest posts from other bloggers at this time.  If you are a blogger and a parent and would like to write a piece on how you stay yummy, or not, please email it me for consideration.

Many thanks all. Stay yummy!