Or should it be Scatty Mummy?

It's no surprise that there's a general consensus that having children kills off your brain cells. Particularly if other Mummies have the same kind of daily experiences as me.

Today I hit the shops with the elder, 4yrs, in tow. Not wanting to browse around, as she was getting tired, and was likely to run down the aisles any minute, I asked a male sales assistant, where I could find the waterproof mattress protectors.

He duly led the way across the store to the correct section and I, trying to steer my daughter in the correct direction behind him, followed.  The elder immediately hid behind a display. I had to do the quick telling off, look up again, clock the sales assistant and continue following him.

He headed straight for the tills. He got in behind one of the tills. I stood next to the till. And he looked up and said, "Can I help you?".

I looked at him. Carefully. Thought about it. And turned around. Another sales assistant was stood slightly further back in the shop looking at me with a confused expression on his face.

I had, of course, managed to follow the wrong sales assistant after telling my daughter off.

You could have fried eggs on my face. Not a good look.

A very timid mummy followed the original sales assistant to the correct side of the shop for my mattress protectors, and tried to protest my innocence... mumbling about uniforms, etc... I didn't help myself.

Hence my apparent evidence in support of the brain cell theory. Doesn't 'distraction by a 4yr old' count as a defence?

3 steps to stop a tantrum...

Some more tips on parenting today. I can't pretend to be expert. I only share what works for us! I'll be talking about make-up cleansers next time - because I've been getting spots since wearing make-up this last 6 months, and I can only assume it's due to not cleansing it properly at night. So any advice would be good!

Anyway - back to the issue of 'tantrums', or as I call them 'bottom lip moments'!

1. If the tantrum is threatening to start because you have said "No" in response to a request for something, immediately get down to your child's level. If they are talking, wait patiently for a pause, and then say "(Name of Child), Mummy has said No. That means No."

2. If the issue is one of timing, then you can follow this, before they get chance to interrupt ideally, with a brief explanation why. And it should be brief. For example; "You cannot have a chocolate biscuit now, because we are going to have dinner in a minute. If you behave nicely, and eat up your dinner, you may be able to have something chocolaty for pudding". Be careful to actually allow this if you promise it. If you don't want them to have a biscuit at all, then no promises of one later should be made. Above all you need to be trustworthy!

3. Immediately distract the child with an activity. "Come on; let's do some sticking before dinner"

The response is likely to be either; a full on, bottom lip out, stamping feet, crying tantrum. Or, an obliging child, sufficiently told, happy(ish) to do 'sticking' for the time being. If you do get the tantrum, you have one extra step of your choice.

Either, you warn the child that if they continue to scream and shout after you've counted to five, they will have to go on the Naughty Step. And follow it through.

Or, state clearly that you will not discuss this anymore, and turn your attention away from the child (either by going out of the room, or turning to play with another sibling, actively making a big deal out of the fun you and the other child are having.)

I find these methods work really well. I rarely manage to count to five. And when the elder does stop sniffling, and is clearly making an effort to calm down, I immediately stop counting and revert to the distraction activity again, but making a big deal about how well she has done to calm down. "Well done! We can go and do some sticking now. We don't want to be crying do we. Let's quickly blow your nose," (move child across the room, or into another room) "and we'll get those Dora stickers out. Cor! There's a lot of stickers here. Shall we make a card, or a picture?"

Throwing more questions her way makes her think about something else. And moving her, even if just to get a tissue, is distracting because her environment changes. And if I'm lucky, the episode ends there.

I hope that's helpful. Let me know if anyone has any other methods for dealing with those 'bottom lip' moments!